Dead Week and Finals after

This week is dead week at school and finals is the next week.  Please forgive me but if I have to choose between my family suffering, my grades suffering, or my blog I am going to have to choose my blog.  I will post when I have time but right now time is a precious commodity. See you on the other side.

Trailer Trash Tuesday- Thankful for Laundry

Fifth wheel living means no washer and dryer.  I used to have to pack up all the kids and take a weeks worth of laundry to the laundry mat every Tuesday, because that is when they had 1/2 price drying time.

These days I am blessed with a SIL who lives in town and lets me use their washer and dryer.  Lately, all I've had to do is drop off my laundry with my kids.  My kids end up happy and my laundry is washed and dry when I get home from school.  It is a huge blessing.

Of course, occasionally the kids will get sick or have an accident and then I still have to spend two hours at the laundromat, but luckily those are few and far between. Now, I just need to fold it all, so that it isn't taking up half my living area.

But today, I am thankful for having laundry to fold and in laws to help me clean and dry it all.

Mommy Monday- Thankful

In honor of Thanksgiving on Thursday, this week will be a 'I'm thankful for' theme feature each day according to topic.

Can I just say that my kids are awesome? I am so thankful to be their mother. I'm thankful for my kids. They make me laugh everyday.

J1- Is growing into a fine young man.  He is developing a good work habit at school and scouts.  He endures his affliction well and is finally starting to not take himself so seriously.  He still loves to give me hugs and I love it.

A1- Is my darling girl who just wants to be loved.  She is sensitive, like her mom, and is mindful of other's feelings.  She loves to sing and has a beautiful voice. She is doing great in school and makes me so proud.

J2- Is such an outgoing and fun boy.  He loves to tell jokes even if they don't make any sense.  He is currently running laps at school so that he can earn rubber ducks.  He says he is going to win a ton and sell them all to make lots of money so we can buy a house with stairs.  He just melts my heart.

A2- Is my little shadow.  She is a little princess. She is always seeking me out for hugs and kisses.  She also loves babying the neighbor's cat and is always asking people if she can pet their dogs.

I didn't originally seek out motherhood, but it found me.  I am so grateful that they are a part of my life.  I think they have taught me more about love and compassion than I would have been able to learn on my own. I am eternally grateful that they are mine.

Friends on Friday- Alicia

Alicia is beautiful on the inside and out, it almost makes you want to hate her. She is actually impossible to hate. She is so sweet, talented, and just an overall good woman. I am honestly jealous of her because she has a BA in Theatre Arts already.  But she is just so darn likable and lovable. She and I are both artists, actresses, wives, and mothers but she has the added bonus of being some other great things that you will find out below. We are determined to meet in Ashland one day, but it hasn't happened yet.  So, for now I will just harass her by interview.

A beautiful woman and a little boy who adores his mama.

N: Could you tell me about yourself?

A: This is always the hardest question for me to answer because there are so many factors that make up who I am. I earned my BA in Theatre Arts from San Jose State University in 1999. Twelve hours after graduating, I hopped on a plan to do ranch work in Colorado for a couple years and then returned to California where I worked as a barn manager and educator for the Humane Society of Silicon Valley before returning to SJSU earn my teaching credential. In 2005, I earned my MA in Education Administration/Supervision from CSU Chico and married B, my soul mate. We have two boys – W (3 ½) and C (1 ½) – and they are my world. 

The family

I am an artist, actress, rancher, wife, teacher, and mother. I have a hard time finding time for each part of myself – so for now I am focusing on being the best wife, mother, and teacher possible. As my boys grow up, I would really like to get back into acting and someday start an educational ranch.

N: What are you passionate about?

A: I don’t know if this will make much sense, but I am passionate about the creative process – be it art, poetry, acting, or teaching. I absolutely love to create and explore. I am not good at following paths that have been set for me…I need to create my own. I get a rush out of making new things – websites, lessons, stories, etc.

I had to throw in one silly picture because she jokingly told me not to.
Here she is as Concita in Last Cha Cha for the Bahama Mama

I also love inspiring others to help make a difference in helping Earth. I believe that every little action makes a difference and that everything and everyone is connected. I filmed a documentary in Yosemite National Park in the 90s and hope to someday bring it all together with current footage and interviews.

N: What was a defining moment in your life?

May 30, 1999 – hours after graduating from college, I hopped on a plan to Colorado where I had never been before. Several of my friends were moving to Los Angeles to make it in the movies or they were staying in the San Francisco theatres (I managed a show at the time in SF), but I decided to leave and pursue my passion for horses and ranch work as the Kids’ Wrangler at Elk Mountain Ranch in Buena Vista, Colorado. I cannot fully explain what happened, but I made a decision for the benefit of my future family. I wanted to begin a life that I could share with others. Acting in and managing shows every weekend and doing late night radio work did not lend itself to having a family…so I left that life behind. 

The following year, I met Brandon and as life has turned out, I know that it was the best decision I have ever made. Do I ever wonder how things would have turned out had I gone to L.A. or stayed in SF? Absolutely! Do I long for the spotlight…the stage…the rush of acting? Definitely! But looking at my boys and hearing them laugh as they ride our horses reminds my why I hopped on that plane so many years ago. And I know someday I will return to my first love!

Here she is with her soul mate.
(Her bouquet is full of my favorite kind of roses, she has good taste)

N: Wow, you are amazing. Excuse me for being naive but what is an educational ranch?

A: I don't know about amazing, but thank you.

You are not naive - my concept for an educational ranch is not very well known, and I don't know if there is a ranch out there already doing what I hope to someday do. I would like to take the idea of a guest ranch/dude ranch and expand it to include an educational component. Part of the year, it would be open for traditional family vacations and the other part of the year it would be reserved as an outdoor school. Classes could visit for a day up to a week to experience ranch life and all of its connections to science, writing, art, math, history, etc. It would essentially be a hands on educational facility.

N: Would you mind sharing some of your poetry or a short story?

A: Oh, gosh, it is hard for me to open up and share my writing because it is usually so personal...but here goes...

Here is a little poem that I wrote just over two years ago, in memory of a dear friend (and my mentor) who passed away on 11-11-09. It isn't earth shattering, but it was a healing poem for me...words often help me heal:

Some sights cannot fully be captured in a picture…
…the brilliant orange hue of a glowing full moon
…a herd of deer grazing peacefully in a misty meadow
…the calm of a glorious lake after Winter’s first storm

Some emotions cannot fully be captured in words…
…the never ending impact a teacher has on a child
…the pain of watching a friend lose her battle with cancer
…the love one person can feel for another

These moments cannot be captured…
…they must be lived
…they must be honored
…they must be remembered

Through art and writing, Nancy taught me to open my eyes and take in the world for all of its beauty. She taught me to believe - in others and in myself. I am eternally grateful for her presence in my life over the past 20 years. Her memory will be honored and remembered.

And another one that I found - it is actually a song that I wrote for another friend, Tom, who passed away in December of 2005.

Dancing With Angels

Your time came too quickly,
I never even said goodbye;
Not that I would have anyway,
I never believed you would die.

I hope you're dancing with angels,
and they hold you close in their arms;
I hope you're dancing with angels,
and I hope they sing you this song.

About hard times and how you got through them,
About freedom and finding your way;
About always being true to yourself,
No matter what people may say.

I hope you're dancing with angels,
And they hold you close in their arms;
I hope you're dancing with angels,
And I hope they sing you this song.

About good times and laughter and romance,
About friendships that never will fade;
How someday we'll all be together again,
And I'll tell you what I meant to say.

I hope you're dancing with angels,
And they hold you close in their arms;
I hope you're dancing with angels,
And I hope they sing you this song...
...Oh, someday I'll sing you this song.

I really do write about things other than death...but I am an emotional writer and for some reason these were the two that I could easily find/remember quickly. I do have a book of several songs that I have written over the years. Someday I will find the courage to share them with others. I am actually learning to play guitar right now so that I can put music to my lyrics...it will be quite some time though before that happens. I am not a natural. lol.

N: Those were wonderful, thank you for sharing them. I appreciate it. What is your favorite thing about being a mother?

A: Absolutely, positively everything. I never would have expected that having kids would be such a powerful experience, but it is - and I enjoy each moment. I love hearing the laughs and giggles and watching my boys explore and try new things. I love the hugs and the silly stories and the constant questions. I love watching my boys ride their horse and make messes with paints. I just love watching them grow. Life is such a miracle and my crazy, adorable boys are the best.

Alicia with her boys and one of their horses.

In an odd sort of way - I even enjoy the tough moments like sleepless nights. When times are rough, I remind myself that they will only be young once and that the fact that they are alive and breathing in the middle of a long night is a miracle to be thankful for. (W's lungs collapsed at birth so I think I value every breath more than some, and a dear friend's 2 year old just survived cancer/5 months of chemo. I truly value each day with my boys for the gift that it is.) I just love being a mom and knowing that I get to share my life with my husband, watching (and helping) two boys grow up. I like to say that my job in life has become to raise two future Mr. (W)Rights.

Thank you...from the bottom of my heart... for sharing your personal stories through your blog, for interviewing friends, and for inspiring me.

Family is the best.

N:  Alicia, I am honored to be YOUR friend.  Thank you for sharing your poetry. It was beautiful as are you. Thank you for encouraging me to follow my dreams and not making me feel silly for pursuing them.  I am grateful that you are in my life and I look forward to being your friend for the rest of our lives.  I think your idea of an educational ranch is inspiring and I am in awe of your talents as a mother.  I look forward to seeing you succeed in your endeavors. Thank you for reminding me that our choices are what defines us, so we must always choose the good and that choosing our families is always the best choice. What can I say except, I adore you.

Theatre Thursday- Kiss Me, Kate

Publicity shot for Kiss Me, Kate

Kiss Me, Kate was the first musical in which I have performed.  I played Lois/Bianca and it was a lot of work but very fun. It was put on by the Gilbert Fine Arts Association and directed by the same man who directed The Hasty Heart. It seemed that we had several obstacles put in our path to put on this show but it was fun nonetheless.  It is a show about a theatre group that puts on a musical version of The Taming of the Shrew. This is what Chris Page from the East Valley Tribune had to say about my performance:

 ...a lovely actress and Hale Centre Theatre regular who earlier confessed to me she was more nervous about her singing than doing scenes of Shakespeare — proved she’s got worthy stage pipes and a command of the stage that allows her to walk away with the show in ditties like "Always True to You (In My Fashion). 
(I can link you to the full article upon request.)

I wasn't just nervous. I was terrified.  I had been extensively trained in performing Shakespeare but had just started some vocal lessons.  Now, it was not a perfect performance. I listen and watch it now and I can see areas for improvement.  I always think I can do better and try to do better. I think I would change some of my vocal choices now but, it was what it was.

On the night that Chris Page saw the show, I was a mess before hand.  Then something clicked and I didn't care anymore. I decided to go out there and give it my all.  I wish I had a copy of that performance so that I could compare it to the one I've got.  It was electrifying.

Vocally, I don't feel that "Always True to You" was my strongest song in the show.  But, it seems to be the only one that I can pull off of the DVD at the moment, so you are stuck with it.

So here it is for your viewing pleasure?

And part two:

By the way, the guy you hear laughing at times is my good friend Jere.  Thoughts? Criticisms?  All are appreciated.

Whatever Wednesday- Blessed Dressed

I scored the deal of the century the other day.  I happened to go into JCPenny and they had a rack of 97 cent clothing~ 97 cents and I couldn't resist.  It was all women's clothes.  And although it was mostly summertime clothes, some of it could be used to layer. I also found a dress that was almost identical to one I was going to buy during the summer but couldn't justify the original $60 price tag.  You heard that right, I got a sixty dollar dress for 97 pennies.

I wore it for the first time on a Sunday and my hubby couldn't resist taking a picture.  He is notorious for trying to take pictures of me at my worst, so it was nice for him to actually take pictures when I was dressed up.

Me turning around wondering what the hubs was up to.

So, I finally turned around to get a proper picture and J2 decided he needed to be in the picture.  I had to leave my sunglasses on because it was actually a sunny day and the sun was shining in my eyes.  I would have liked to have some black sunglasses but I haven't found any good ones that I like for a decent price. But other than that I actually really liked this outfit and I can't complain about the price at all.

This 97 cent dress served as a reminder to me of the many times that I have been blessed.  It is amazing that since we have lived in the 5th wheel that I simply express some silly desire that I would like and God seems to grant my wants in miraculous ways.  I had a desire to feed my kids more vegetables and the next week without me expressing this want to anyone I was bombarded with more veggies than I knew what to do with. On another occasion, one of my kids were in need of shoes and I was going to hot glue the sole to get them to last a little bit longer and then he was given a pair by someone.

When we knew that God wanted the hubs to go to Nursing school, we had no idea how we would be able to afford it.  Then we were blessed to find out about the Ford Family Foundation Re-Start scholarship.  He was eventually awarded this scholarship that pays 90% of all the total costs of attending.  We have truly been blessed.

So, now I find myself wondering how in the world an old gal like me is going to compete with 18 year olds for  a spot in the SOU Theatre Arts BFA acting program.  I know it is what God wants me to do but sometimes I have no clue how it is going to happen.  Then I remember the things I have been blessed with and realize that with God all things are possible.  Even though, I have been told that it is nearly impossible for a transfer student to get into the Acting program, I am reminded by a quote I saw on the internet that is credited to Audrey Hepburn in which she says,

So, I will banish my doubts and trust in the Lord.  You should do it too, it works wonders.

Trailer Trash Tuesday-Dream home

Last night I had a dream that we had found a house to live in Medford.  It wasn't anything fancy, it was modestly priced.  It also came with beds in each of the four bedrooms, I was really excited about that in my dream.  Of course, upon  waking I was thinking that it would be kind of gross to use other peoples beds. There could have been bed bugs or all kinds of nasty stuff.

In the dream, the former owners of the house had left a bunch of their stuff, Ammon and I looked at each other and said "Garage sale!" It was a nice dream though, because all of the kids had their own full sized bed.  We also had a washer and dryer.  The kitchen was full sized.  Then things got weird because suddenly we realized that someone was sleeping in our master bedroom.  The man woke up, he had a full white beard and looked like a cross between my music teacher and Santa Claus.

He explained that he was a private investigator and  had been staking out a neighbor.  He had been told the house was abandoned and wouldn't be sold soon.  He was actually really nice, but it was still creepy. We then sent him on his way.  I awoke and despite the weird things, I was left wide awake wishing the dream was real.

But, alas it is not.  I can't spend my day wishing for something that cannot be right now.  I must enjoy the time we've got left in the trailer, because we are over halfway done. Off to fold laundry, do some Punnet squares and conquer the Biology lab today. I hope your day is great too.