Mommy Monday- TEENAGER!

It has finally happened. I have become the mother of a teenager. Where did the time go?

J1's birthday is to day and we celebrated this morning with birthday waffles.  He had his favorite meal of orange chicken and pork fried rice.  He chose a sophisticated turtle chocolate torte for his birthday cake.  We sang. He opened his gift and is now glued to the television playing a game on an actual school night. He is happy as a clam.

Poor J2 ended up getting sick after his birthday doughnut last Friday. I got a call right before my Chemistry class that he had gotten sick so I came home.  I ended up cleaning puke most of the day.  Later that night, J1 got sick at his scout camp out so I drove out and picked him up.  Then around midnight I got sick!  It was not fun.

We got a new cake for J2 and sang to him a day late even though I wasn't fully feeling well. He had fun and today we also gave him a belated gift.

All is well. What more could a mom ask?

Theatre Thursday- I'm singing!

I am taking voice lessons in an effort to improve my voice and work on breath support. I apparently have a knack for picking songs that are really hard to sing. I am currently working on Maybe This Time from Cabaret and Unexpected Song from Song and Dance.  Unexpectedly, Unexpected Song is easier for me and I felt like it was the one song that if I could sing it, I could sing anything I wanted. I was so naive.

Good news is I can hit a high G and even all the way up to a high B flat on a good day and I can sing as low as a man. My range has been surprising. My issues it turns out are mostly psychological.  I am not used to hearing myself sing high and when I know a higher note is coming, I have a bad habit of psyching myself out.

We went through Maybe This Time and made some conscious acting choices and it helped but I have found that I am out of shape acting wise, because it has been so long. I am enjoying it but I had taken for granted how hard it can actually be to perform.  Add on top of that, singing correctly while giving a meaningful and believable performance and I was intimidated. It did however help my singing and I sounded better than ever, until I got to the section where  I knew the notes were high.

The crazy thing is that Unexpected Song has even higher notes than Maybe This Time, but I don't have any problem hitting them.  My issues in that song are breathing in all the correct places.

So, I have learned I have issues.  My voice instructor joked that maybe I need a counselor and not voice lessons. My voice is amazing according to him. I just need to believe in myself.  So, I am going to work on believing in myself, but I could sure use some outside encouragement.

Of course, I realize that I really just need to accept that I am amazing. Not just that I will be awesome in the future, which I will, but that I am pretty special right now.  Why must it be so hard for me to believe that I am of worth?  I need some self esteem lessons.

I'm not perfect and I never will be, but what I am right now is enough for right now. Onwards and upwards!